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Hey bitches!

Remember when I posted this, exactly three weeks ago, about Trank having a new iPhone?

Well, Trank just posted this this.

Yes, I know, I'm amazing.

I also know what the next album is going to be called, because he texted my iPhone from his iPhone. I then emailed Angelman's iPhone with the information. Jealous yet?

You should be.

Posted by Gabriel | Permalink


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As much as I didn't like Year Zero, this new album title has me EXCITED. Thanks, GABRIEL.

iPhone powers... ACTIVATE!

Posted by: Angelman | Jul 17, 2007 8:16:51 PM

Wow. You predicted a Mac man would buy an Apple product. You're a fucking genius. Blowjobs for you. -yawn-

Posted by: Iris | Jul 17, 2007 8:32:44 PM

Why is Iris so angry?

Posted by: Angelman | Jul 17, 2007 9:11:32 PM

Perhaps her unfair termination had something to do with it?

Trent should hold secret meetings for iPhone owners at his house in L.A. And they can get together to talk about how cool their iPhones are. The secret password will be "Pinch my display" or something.

Posted by: maise | Jul 17, 2007 9:44:20 PM

How did you know about our secret iPhone meetings???!!!

Posted by: Angelman | Jul 17, 2007 9:49:22 PM

I guess if I had to pin it down it would be the amount of ass licking you three (JR included) accomplish for each other. It no longer matters what side of the argument/conversation/opinion anyone takes on it always turns into "OMG Gabriel/Angelman just SO PWNED your ass" followed by JR's "-swoon- Gabe and Angelman are so dreamy" and frankly it's tiring, boring, and makes me delete most of the comments I start because it’s just not worth the effort.

Yeah, yeah, yeah this website was started with sarcasm and obvious conclusions but at least it was funny back then.

Posted by: Iris | Jul 17, 2007 10:12:02 PM

I'm sure Trent didn't have to buy the iPhone. That's the joy of celebrity...you get a lot of shit free.

Posted by: The Bitch | Jul 17, 2007 10:34:00 PM

Angelman, not only do I know about the secret meetings, but I also know about the hooded robes you all wear. Like the Druids, except with the Apple logo on the back.

Posted by: maise | Jul 17, 2007 10:39:19 PM

Iris -

Wait!!! WAIT!!! First Maise knows about the Druidic iPhone meetings...now YOU know about our unholy ass-licking ring (sponsored by Apple)!!!

but, BUT... really this site has not been funny or interesting for some time. Most of the time I don't even try to be funny and, after like 16 years of knowing Gabriel we kind of fall into the obnoxious "we pwned evebody" routine like a comfy pair of shoes. I do it out of boredom. Come on... when was the last time this site was relevant?

Posted by: Angelman | Jul 18, 2007 12:06:45 AM

Y A W N.

Posted by: Dierdre | Jul 18, 2007 5:12:49 AM

The real question is, does Dierdre have chronic fatigue syndrome or narcolepsy?

Posted by: maise | Jul 18, 2007 5:41:10 AM

Did anyone know that Trent collaborated with Rob Halford and Dave Ogilvie on something called 2WO?

Posted by: Isabel | Jul 18, 2007 6:17:10 AM

Iris, do you need to be reminded AGAIN of how similar my admiration for Gabriel and Angelman is to the admiration you used to have for Trent?

Remember back when he actually got you inspired enough to create NIN-related macaroni art? You know, the old days, before that steaming pile of excrement (that no one is listening to) known as Year Zero was dropped? You'd drop 100 words about the T-man without even blinking.

Now you're reduced to getting mad at me. It's sad.

Posted by: JR | Jul 18, 2007 6:23:32 AM

I think this was written about Gabriel and Angelman.

Posted by: Sam I Am | Jul 18, 2007 6:31:04 AM

you know what's obnoxious Iris? How you take a simple open-ended post that I wrote intentionally to give multiple jumping off points for riffage (rob likely really posted this, so its an example of him being a fetishistic dork yet again, or he's merely copying me - again. Or perhaps its further proof of Trent reading WTC. Or perhaps it says something about the "rebellious" nature of nin fans that they would want to brand themselves. Or maybe it speaks to how out of touch the empire of dirt is that they think all their fans can afford a $600 phone).

Point being, with a plethora of options, you jack the thread and make it all about you. Now granted, you made it about how bitter you are that I am so awesome, but come on - watch what jr is doing and take some notes.

Posted by: Gabriel | Jul 18, 2007 8:33:00 AM

JR - Gabriel and Angelman and indeed everybody on this site (including me) are all complete nobodies - What delusions of grandeur do you have?

Posted by: Isabel | Jul 18, 2007 8:57:24 AM

Ugh, it's getting to be like ETS on steroids around here.

Well, all I have to say is, thanks a lot, Steve Jobs! Because you know that Trent is too busy playing with his iPhone to work on Year Zero 2: Electric Boogaloo. A more pressing question is, and perhaps our experts can answer this...can Trent lift weights and use the iPhone at the same time?

Posted by: maise | Jul 18, 2007 9:04:58 AM

I've never been a fan of soap operas, who has the remote?

Posted by: RainbowVomit | Jul 18, 2007 9:37:14 AM

Of course he can, Maise. That's why Satan made bluetooth headsets.

Incidentally, I'm posting from my iPhone right now.

Posted by: Gabriel | Jul 18, 2007 9:41:34 AM

I wanna see the macaroni art - post it!

Posted by: pokeydots | Jul 18, 2007 9:48:13 AM


Posted by: maise | Jul 18, 2007 10:09:56 AM

Maise, you're just tipping your hand and showing how much you DON'T know about the iPhone. It comes with a virtual weightlifting program.

And if that's not enough, I heard Trent has considered filling the box it came in with quick-set concrete and using that. He got the idea from an episode of This Old House that was on when he fell asleep the other night. Or at least that's what I heard.

Posted by: JR | Jul 18, 2007 10:18:01 AM

Isabel, I don't know what gave you the impression that I am harboring "delusions of grandeur". I am just another anonymous schlub down here with the rest of you.


Posted by: JR | Jul 18, 2007 10:20:55 AM

Somehow I picture you smirking in you’re awesomeness as pretty much the sole author, hunched over your iPhone...sorry...your Internet Communication Device, furiously typing to fend off retarded comments, make obvious conclusions as though you were a super genius, and looking for ways to totally pwn one of us all while Bon Jovi is playing from said iPhone.

”I’m going doooooown / in a blaze of glooooory”

And I don’t exactly understand how I’m getting ripped on about making a thread all about me when you do that all. the. time. Shit the opening post is about you and your self proclaimed iAwesomeness.

You know what site I love though? This one. Speak the truth, brother.

Posted by: Iris | Jul 18, 2007 10:25:53 AM

Maddox is a total genius. Everyone knows this. I've know this since I was reading the site fucking YEARS ago when he was bitching about the Matrix movies. But that's neat that you're jumping on board too, Iris-Come-Lately. Welcome to 2003. However, given that Maise already posted the link to his site, you would do well to come up with an "argument" of your own, dear.

And seriously -- don't be jealous of Trent and Angelman and I's iPhones. It's not very becoming.

Posted by: Gabriel | Jul 18, 2007 10:41:13 AM

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