[Dear_Trent_#_32]

Dear Trent,

Hey sweets. How you doin'?

I guess there isn't a whole heck of a lot to say to you lately. I mean, truthfully, as far as your smokin' hot ass, scandalously pornographic teeth, and scrumptious hairiness go, I think we've pretty much covered it. It's no secret that there are literally armies of young women and men who would be delighted to be on the recieving end of a good rogering if you were dealing it out. What can I tell you, Sparklepants? We at WearingTheseChains are some of them.

Likewise, I think we have firmly established where we stand with regard to either the (perfectly reasonable and justified) love or the (totally irrational and obviously hysterical) hate where your new record is concerned, right? For my part, [With_Teeth] still totally makes me want to make out with you until I can no longer remember my own name, but the feeling, apparently is not unanimous. You know what though, Trent? I wouldn't worry about the hate too much, because I happen to know that Gabriel plans not only on buying tickets, but actually flying from Los Angeles to New York to see Guns n' Roses, so... Yeah. Nothing to worry about there. Some people are just hopeless fucktards, is all.

I guess what I'm left with, then, in this installment of the declaration of my eternal, unflagging love, is the fervent hope that while you are taking a break from the tour that never fucking ends, you are pouring your gorgeous little heart out to make me a new record. Oh man! That would be so awesome! Either that, baby, or could you schedule the webcast of a mud-wrestling tournament in which you take on all the former members of Nine Inch Nails who are behaving like jilted lovers? I think Maise could use a little entertainment. In case you haven't heard, punkin, her job is pretty boring.

I love you!

xxx,
Dierdre