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Dear Trent,

It's been DAYS since I've written, I know; but rest assured that I was thinking of you and feeling your presence on the earth for every minute from my last letter to now, as if an invisible string tied you to my heart. Every morning when I wake up I check for all the latest news of you, and then your tour schedule, so that I can picture where you might be, whether you're travelling, or staying over in a city. Every night before I drift off into my own dreams, I picture you sleeping and dreaming, your eyes gently closed, lips barely parted, and I say a little prayer to no one in particular that you are safe and well, breathing softly somewhere in your night.

Sometimes I try to imagine what your days are like. Do you read the paper, with a cup of coffee in the morning, or do you get all your news from the internet? Do you take millions of phone calls and e-mails, and deal with business all day long, or do you sit in thoughtful silence, with melodies running through your mind? Do you have a journal? Do you write music or words everyday? Do you sleep on a bus sometimes? Do you hang out with the guys in your band, or spend your time alone? Is everything about your tour run like a well-oiled machine, or are there little fires to put out all the time that drive you crazy?

Sometimes I think that if I were given a choice between being your lover, and being invisible -- like the angels in Wings of Desire -- so I could just watch you do everything you do, I would choose to be invisible. I'd watch you and see you as you are, completely unto yourself: your moods, your expressions, your routines, how you sleep, the way you look at yourself in the mirror, how you touch yourself -- everything you are and do when you're alone and undisturbed. If I could, I would make you the subject of my constant study, but I know you would always be a beautiful mystery to me.

Dear, dear Trent! You and I shall be together in San Diego in only 5 days, and your electric presence will course through my very bones. I can't wait. The very thought of seeing you again, in all of your raven-haired, newly-musclebound glory, makes me tingle -- and I won't specify where.

I burn for you, baby. Really I do.


Posted by Gabriel in dear_trent | Permalink


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I'm not completely sure why, but that was hot. I'm a little jealous of Trent right now.

Posted by: Peter | May 26, 2005 1:09:29 AM

I'm touched, Peter! (... IN THE HEAD! Pfft. As if THAT weren't totally obvious!) Thanks for reading and posting.

Posted by: Dierdre | May 26, 2005 8:54:17 AM

I'm pretty sure I'd choose the same way you did. I've thought about it long and hard and I don't think I could deal with the man on the day-to-day level. It'd be too much.

But to watch him on the day-to-day level? Well, I am a journalism student, and observing is something I'm supposed to be good at...

Posted by: emerald527 | May 26, 2005 10:03:37 AM

Aren't you embarrassed to post this kind of stupid shit someplace where everyone can see it? Jesus. I think this would make Trent Reznor projectile vomit like Linda Blair in the Exorcist.

Please! Get ahold of yourself. This is mortifying.

Posted by: Anonymous | May 26, 2005 11:27:08 AM

I'll never understand why we should all feel so ashamed of love. Is it any less valid to feel love for someone because they inspire you and make you dream beautiful dreams than it is because they're your neighbor down the street and they have a nice ass? Personally, I think that my love for Trent is no less real than any other kind of love, and I'm not in the slightest bit embarrassed to express it here on my blog.

I guess I could have just answered by saying "FUCK YOU!" but I really do wonder. What's so embarrassing about this?

Posted by: Dierdre | May 26, 2005 12:21:25 PM

I like it, Dierdre. I think you're just saying what a lot of us really feel. Trent is fascinating, and I like it that you say so.

Posted by: trezfangirl | May 26, 2005 1:03:35 PM

Kick ass Dierdre. Beautiful words, spoken from the heart. Embarrassed are those who are ashamed to post their names and have to hide behind an anonymous title...

Posted by: Tormented_Soul_3 | May 26, 2005 1:25:55 PM

tormented_soul_3: Thanks, sweetiepants. You are the rulingest.

Em: sometimes observation is truly the greatest pleasure of all, especially with so remarkable a creature.

Posted by: Dierdre | May 26, 2005 4:34:52 PM

I love you, too. Dierdre.

Posted by: Trent | May 26, 2005 6:24:43 PM

Hell. I want to believe!

Trent, you dreamboat. Will you marry me?

Posted by: Dierdre | May 26, 2005 7:15:49 PM

Just what the fucking world needs. More squealing fangirls. Do you even listen to music, you stupid groupie? If you think Trent actually posted his love to you on this ass-fuckingly stupid website, I'd like to sell you a bridge.

Go get a clue, bitch.

Posted by: Anonymous | May 26, 2005 9:36:33 PM

The clue to be gotten ass fuck is that you don't need to climb on this site to shoot people's feelings down. You obviously have less of a life then the fans here seeing how you have nothing to offer but childish cursing. And what, you think Trent would back you for telling her to go fuck herself for sharing her honest emotions? Suck shit through a straw a die anonymous.

Posted by: Tormented_Soul_3 | Jun 2, 2005 11:13:48 AM

Thanks for sticking up for me, ts3. I know Trent would totally hate anonymous.

Also, I'm not a groupie. A groupie just wants to blow rock stars, and would probably go down on Twiggy to get near Trent. I would never do that. I love one man, and one man only.

Posted by: Dierdre | Jun 2, 2005 12:07:28 PM

That's my girl.

Posted by: Tormented_Soul_3 | Jun 2, 2005 3:30:59 PM

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